Tuesday, January 15, 2008

and so it begins....

So there I am, Friday evening in Tesco's with my Em doing the weekend shopping when Em turns around and states with glee....

"Daddy, Mammy's getting married in September......"

"Errrm, Oh thats fantastic news....... pass me a tin of those mushy peas....... second shelf down, not the bashed one, one from the back, thanks"

My immediate response was not to rain on Em's parade. If Sue is getting married then I assume Em would be one of several bridesmaids and just how exciting could that be for a little girl!

Of course while I'm saying "Oh, thats fantastic" I've already processed several hundred possible scenarios as to how bad this could be for Em and me...... I finally stick with the one most probably (in my mind anyhow).... and it goes something like this...

They marry, move away. Em has to change school, new friends, turmoil, upheaval, resentment. He gets custody of his kid who will now live with them and Emily becomes the second class citizen that causes trouble while his kid can do no wrong and I end up doing time for GBH.

By the time I've placed the mushy peas in the basket things have changed, I know what it's like to be around Sue for an extended period..... all I can do is chuckle to myself. Oh boy, I feel as if I should be making myself comfy with a big bucket of popcorn in anticipation of the events that will undoubtedly unfold.

Ok, enough of that. It's never as bad as it seems at first, and the fact is.... it's not bad at all.

Sue has no plans of moving away just yet, maybe that'll change when her husband decides what is best for his new family, who knows. All I can do is make sure Em has a fantastic time at the wedding and a clear and uninterrupted line of communication to me whenever she needs it.

I did have a long discussion with Sue on this very subject. She's confident that nothing will change, and I'm fairly confident she believes that. I just wish Em didn't have to be involved in the things that will come.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ooohhh, that's hard keeping such a straight head with news like this. Sue has to know how important you are in Em's life, she'll stay.

Anonymous said...

My distate for reality shows extends only to moldy rock stars and actors who think we really care how messy their dogs are or how wicked their children. You were in the kind of reality show that means something. Still friends?

chux said...

ahhhh i've been out of it a bit then. I know you must be going through 'changeable' emmotions on this subject. If you can keep this level you've spoken about then that is totally fantastic mate. Don't worry about things you can't change, just concentrate on the difference you can make. In this instance that means providing a loving and stable refuge for Emily. We both know that she'll need that.

chux said...

ahhhh i've been out of it a bit then. I know you must be going through 'changeable' emmotions on this subject. If you can keep this level you've spoken about then that is totally fantastic mate. Don't worry about things you can't change, just concentrate on the difference you can make. In this instance that means providing a loving and stable refuge for Emily. We both know that she'll need that.

Anonymous said...

Dave M8

If an plastic hip doesnt change u nothing will!! Glad to here op went ok and ur on the mend. 1st thing I heard about it was a text from Chux while skiing in Slovakia!!

Get well soon Dave...got what a fantastic blog too. Obviously been missing out!!

Take care.

Rich